Dear Abby: I was recently diagnosed with prostate cancer, how to say my family?

Dear Abby: I am lucky that most of my neighbors are kind and attentive. We have all enjoyed the sharing of each other’s celebrations. However, there is a family among the five families with whom we have never been able to connect with a personal level. Despite our efforts, such as giving gifts and food, they have always been irresponsible. While there is no hostility, there is also no report.

Recently, an issue has been born that is becoming more and more trouble. Their garage is so filled with I belong to park their car outside. Unfortunately, the car has an extremely sensitive alarm system that turns off many times at night. I have witnessed that it was caused by their cat jumping into the car. The alarm sounds for 15-20 seconds, and is high enough to interrupt sleep, which has been a constant problem for the last six months.

I consider myself a generally easy person, but this is disappointing. What is the most respectable way to address this issue with the family, give that we have had limited interaction with them? – Sleeping in Bellevue, Washington

Darling Sleeping: Write the couple a note and explain that for the last six months their car alarm has awakened you. Emphasize that the cause may be their cat by jumping into the vehicle in the morning hours, and ask if the alarm may be decided to be less sensitive or if their fluffy family member can be kept inside.

They will not know that there is a problem if you do not join that there is one. (I wonder how the rest of the neighbors feel about this?) If the concern goes on, you will have to report it as a trouble for the homeowners’ association, if there is one, or to the police as the latest solution. You have my sympathy.

Dear Abby: I am 66 years old and diagnosed with moderately aggressive prostate cancer. I will soon begin radiation therapy. My wife knows about it and it has been very supportive, but we have not shared it with my children, sisters, relatives or friends.

One of the reasons for silence was that my bride was waiting for their first child, and I didn’t want to ruin their joy. Now the baby is here, and I’m still not happy to inform them. What is your opinion? Should I tell them, keep a secret or let my wife tell them afterwards, will I not survive the treatment? – California

Dear secretive: To say or not to say is a very personal decision. It may depend on your reason not to want someone to know about your diagnosis. Consider selecting the notice until you have started treatment and see how challenging it may be (or may not be).

If you need emotional support, you may want to tell them that are close to you what is going on or join a support group for cancer. It would be unfair for your wife to make her delay your children, sisters, relatives, etc. Until you have gone because it would blame for keeping your condition from them.

Dear Abby was written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at http://www.dearabby.com or Yes Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.