Dear Abby: My friend continues to invite me for dinner – but her kitchen is repulsive

Dear Abby: My friend often invites me for dinner, and I continue to come with unclear excuses why I can’t come. The reason for my reluctance is its poor kitchen hygiene. The refrigerator always has old food and spill, and its kitchen and sink counters are filled with dirty dishes and left. She does not walk her hands before cooking.

I have helped her clean her kitchen many times as she visits, thinking that she probably just needed instructions, but her old habits climb. Feels difficult and inappropriate to tell her the reason for my constant cancellations. How would you go on? – Shock in the contagious situation

Dear friend: You will not change it. The way to handle this would be to invite it to your place for dinner, agree to have your meals in a restaurant or bring to its place.

Dear Abby: I have recently split, and my divorce will be the last soon. I met a woman who didn’t even know that she could exist. She is perfect for me. The problem is, it lives an hour and a half away and cannot drive the second night in a medical condition.

I have fallen for him, and is mutual. The issues are the distance and the fact that her father simply passed away. She is a widow who lives with her toxic mother. We both want this to work, but it needs time and space. I am willing to give her fine, I believe she is fully worth it.

This is the second serious relationship in my life. My ex and my ex have been together for decades, but among other bad things, she deceived me. I’m asking if you have some tips for me. This young woman is my true “unicorn”. I would do everything for it. I want to be with her, and she says the same thing, but even though her mother is toxic, she does not seem to want to leave her and the bad situation she is in.

Early early, I know, but I’m ready to wait. We have so much in common. She has asked for nothing but space, but I’m almost 40 years old. I’m scared and excited. We want to be a family with a home. Please help me here. – Confused in South Carolina

Dear confused: You have to call enough patience for all this to play. You are still married, and, honestly, you need time to recover your balance after a bad marriage that in recent decades. While I’m sure your “unicorn” is a very special woman, she needs time to grieve her father’s death and decide if she wants to live away from her mother – facing her – may always be part of the package deal.

Happiness and excitement are intoxicating. So do not act unjustly. Take this too slowly. Those long, inappropriate discs can help you gain perspective. Over time, if this is as fair as you hope it will be, you will have the happy ending you are hoping for.

For my Muslim readers: At sunset, it is time for Ramadan’s rapid breaking. Happy Eid al-Fitr, everyone. – Love, Abby

Dear Abby was written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.dearabby.com or yes Box 69440, Los Angeles, Ca 90069.