Social media users share their most memorable NSFW meetings most memorable by brutal noise to fail scary food

There is nothing erotic about these shameful sexual encounters.

Supported by anonymity, reddit.com long served as the Record Website for some of the most shameless internet sex stories, with some high -performance posts that go 14 years.

And if there is a universal truth to get from these wild, slim and Icky tales, is that everyone has at least one experience with Cringey Coitus.

Only in this year, the subgroup of Askreddit only as masses about 7,000 comments in three posts, making users share their most terrible and difficult memories made during the relationship.

Usually the motives of death among the main comments include damage, inebit, exhaustion and uninvited interruptions – plus many warning words.

Here are some of the best of the worst stories to do whoopie.

@Chuglugs was one of the many to say they suffered or triggered a brutal and stubborn nose, painting a terrible view of the first time he had sex with his future wife. They blamed the night scene at his blood alcohol level in a response with over 7,000 upvota from other users.

“The middle of the night comes together, I randomly wake up and I’m good to go and initiate, it is down to it, everything will finally go until I feel a warm juice under my nose. I light the lights and nose I was bleeding all over her face.

Sex can become dangerous when partners become very ambitious, like @tackybrad who took one of his new movements too far.

“Stayed in the same position in a difficult English because my wife liked them,” they started in a response with about 4,300 upvota. “Now, a month later, I still can’t jump and have some trouble on the stairs because I have a gnarly strain on a piece of my leg muscles.”

Sex went from the vapor to sleep for some exhausted Reddit users.

@Masloppyslopslop fell asleep in the middle of a rest – and woke up in a confusion that pushed them to explode out Night, dad of the night to their spoon partner. And @comfortable-box-3569 blame their two full-time work for snoring while engaged in an oral sex act.

Exhibitors know that they are putting themselves at risk with their antiques. Lucky for us readers, sometimes they get caught.

“I take my GF for a walk in the woods. We were both finishing high school and we didn’t have our country, so we went to the external experience. However, we are deep in the pine forest, off the track, we put on a picnic blanket. Cold is cold but we are hot for action, “began @marzus, whose response has won nearly 6,000 upvotes.

While lovebirds are doing their things, @marzubus felt a “strange sensation” to its back end – turning to see a dog burying their snout between his cheeks “and a short way away, the terrified dog owner. ”

The new partners are particularly prone to misconduct, but they may have a barbarian_818 failed to collect even the most basic details.

“I realized I didn’t know her name,” they said in a comment with over 4,000 upvota. To save his face, he stopped in the middle of the break to make a proper presentation.

“I make a joke from her. I put a very full, official accent and introduced my child and out of my hand. She played together and introduced her in the same official way to make fun of. “

Some users share practical tips on the sex they learn the difficult path, advising users to approach “heating” products and mint odors carefully.

“Only the condom available was the one who was a mint. Sounded eight … until burning … ”by a deleted user.

@Maltedbacon bought a heat lubricant that “looked like a good idea.”

“Soon before 30 seconds and we are each bent and complaining in a lonely agony ball.”

@19Thanatos83 there were words for the wise about the wax play after accidentally burning his wife, reminding Kinsters that “there are special candles that do not get too hot for this.”

Reddit users also remembered why food and sex usually do not mix.

“Salt used whipped in foreplay,” wrote @dreyfusblue. “It looks great in movies, but it just makes a greasy mess. Even after you lick it. “

@ACE_OF_SECESS blamed “his Salsa enthusiast” “insufficient hand washing” of girlfriend “let a very spicy masturbation encounter.” Don’t recommend. “